Usher Talks to Oprah About Marriage, Sleeping With Bridesmaid & Relationship With Mom [Video]
Rucuss staffSeptember 17, 2012
Usher reveals all the messy details about his divorce and custody battle with Tameka Raymond during an in-depth interview on Oprah’s Next Chapter.
Usher gives intimate details about his life after being in the media spotlight for the last few months during his bitter custody battle with his ex-wife. Oprah traveled to Atlanta to talk with Usher and his mom at his mansion that was once owned by L.A. Reid.
Oprah put Usher in the hot seat about his relationship with his mom, whether he slept with one of Tameka’s bridesmaids, his regrets of getting married, the death of his stepson, Kile Glover, and if he makes love to his own music. Check out excerpts from the interview below:
On why he agreed to do the interview:
To really give me the opportunity to have a voice because there has been so much that has been said and I have not been able to address it. I never wanted to have to and [I knew that] here, I would have the opportunity to document something that someday my kids will be able to see. This will be the only time that I’ve ever chosen to speak about it, you know? Ive been a man of integrity throughout the entire progress, which I hope that my boys will understand.
On why he regrets marrying Tameka:
It’s pretty hard to walk away from a high-ticket marriage. I’m still kicking myself in the ass behind that one. I say I’m kicking myself in the butt because I always felt like maybe we weren’t ready and maybe this wasn’t the time or the way to do it and part of that played into the demise of it.
I wanted to give her the wedding that she wanted, but I wasn’t quite ready […] I really wanted to do things right or at least the perception of what right may be. I impregnated this woman, we were in a relationship, we were in love, so I felt like this was the right way to do things based off my own… I was taking responsibility because she was pregnant but also too, I don’t know if I had the best point of reference. My own father wasn’t there, so I didn’t want to be like him in a way. At least he married my mother and I don’t know what their story was so let me make the right decision and make this right
On whether he loved Tameka and how he felt about his mother not attending their wedding:
Yes I did. I was in love. My mother, she definitely told me that she didn’t think that it was gonna work. She didn’t come to the wedding, which also played a great deal in my hesitation. I was upset that she couldn’t support me through that very difficult point in my life. If I were in her position, I would have come [to the wedding], just to show support but I understand that it was very hard for her. She’s a single mother. It had always only been me and her. Singles mother have always been extremely protective over their boys. Nobody is good enough for their child ever and this is just the reality of how she dealt with it
On whether he fired his mother:
I never fired her, what happened is I relieved her of her duties. You could consider it firing if that was all that was there, but that’s not. There was a opportunity to be a grandmother, an opportunity to have what truly matters which is family. And that’s why I wanted us to have that separation because it becomes so complicated to communicate in business but not have that foundation of family were we would not have to fight over issues.
On how the media affected his relationship with Tameka:
I think it played a great deal in the insecurities that anyone would have, you know.. do they accept who I’ve chosen? Of course it hurt me. This is supposed to be the light of my life and the person I feel that I’m going to spend the rest of my life with and nobody is responding the way that I’d like them to respond. There were times when I think we both spoke out and we shouldn’t have. My relationship, personally, was always meant to be between me and her and unfortunately those opinions probably drove us in the wrong direction. I can remember being on MTV and I went on and defended her and I should have never have done that. That made no sense. Man if that’s someone you choose then that’s someone who you choose.
On when he knew the marriage was not going to work:
I really felt the marriage was not going to work before Naviyd was born. When we had Usher, it was by far one of the most incredible moments of my life. I couldn’t have been more happy and after that, I did get a great sense of the insecurities that were there and the fact that she wasn’t coping well with being in this position. Being married to Usher, and all that came with that.
On whether he was faithful to Tameka during their marriage:
Towards the end of our marriage, I found myself lost and I just wanted out. [shakes head] No, I was faithful at heart but not faithful all the way. Even having a conversation with another woman, period, about matters of your relationship or emotions is, in my opinion, not being faithful.
On whether he cheated on Tameka:
When we were separated, yes, I was. We were not divorced.
On whether he had an affair with Tameka’s bridesmaid:
Well, the conversation about the bridesmaid has always been one that’s been complicated, very difficult. Outside of my marriage with her and our separation and our divorce, I did have exchanges with [the bridesmaid]. We were friends. She was someone who was a part of the children’s lives before and it had always been perceived that we were in a relationship or we either had some sort of exchange. This was after the marriage.
On why he was absent when Tameka’s son Kile Glover was in the hospital:
I miss Kile and I happened to be in Los Angeles when I received the call from Tameka and she said I need to get back, something happened with Kile up on Lake Lanier. I didn’t know how real it was so I reached out to Ryan, of course respectfully, to get an understanding. He told me that their had been an accident and I said well I can fly Tameka back and would you like me to do that and he said ‘Yes, get her back here as soon as possible,’ so I got her back on the phone and I got her a plane.
[He was] a great part of my life. We cooked together, we laughed, we sang. He loved to sing and dance, he loved to tell jokes. […] It hurts me to hear people speculating that I wasn’t at the funeral because I absolutely was at the funeral. I was at the burial as well.
On his current relationship with Tameka:
We don’t see eye-to-eye. The judge has given her a verdict, has given her order and I try my hardest to abide by that and that 100 percent. The friend that I was to Tameka, I don’t know that I could ever be again because I really felt like we were friends. She made us enemies in a way that I could never understand.
On what made him cry on the witness stand during custody trial:
What made me cry on the witness stand was the fact that I had to conjure up what I had to live in Berlin. I guess their accusation was that I was on drugs or something like that and I said quite the contrary. [He went on to say that he was dealing with his father’s death, not being able to see his children and a list of things that caused him to have a meltdown.]
On if he makes love to his own music:
[Laughs] You caught me. Some may say this may be rather narcissistic, but, um, yeah [laughs] I think i do a pretty god job, I’m a good motivator for the moment. I think if i had a playlist or something like that prepared [….] Some guys don’t take their time; they don’t even care to put music on. I like to set the mood before I actually got there. It starts with a little bit of Teddy P, get a little bit of Luther Vandross in there, a little bit of Marvin Gaye, and then your more modern Usher.
Usher’s mother joins the interview. When asked if she regretted not attending Usher’s wedding, she responded:
No, I still don’t. I couldn’t because I knew that we would be in the space that we have been in for the last year. I knew it. I knew it and I just couldn’t embrace it and there was never a day that he couldn’t call me. […] and trust me I struggled with it. We’ve really had conversations about it. I never said ‘I told you so’ but the thing that I’ve really expressed to him [is] that ‘If you’ve learned something from this, ‘its okay!’ And he has because he said to me, ‘‘I’m sorry, I should have listened.’ and when he said it, I was like ‘Wow! He owned it’. That was really special to me.
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